. The Dessert Years .

There are exceptions to most of Life’s rules. Thus, I can find solace in the fact that I am “excepting” my own previous rule (more of a decision) to change some of the details of my blog. Never one for rules anyway … And moving here seems fitting as I have recently taken a hard-right turn (as opposed to a soft left) regarding my life.

Thus begins, “The Dessert Years, the sequel.”

This is a sequel — the subsequent course of affairs — to the original, “The Dessert Years.” I have blogged my way through ovarian cancer, heart-breaking realities regarding motherhood (and life in general), outrageous adventures in the Land of Menopause as well as the sublime, the silly, the serious and the simple routine events of real-life via my blog ponderings. I went from blogging anonymously, then for friends-only — to livin’ out loud for anyone to see (and read …)

Acting upon the suggestion of one of my students (English Composition) I elected the option of using WordPress. And, honestly, one of my favorite feature is the ability to have smiley faces in posts and comments! Oh, sure, I uploaded and used smileys, but being able to simply type away and have those little faces automatically insert themselves, is well, fabulous!

So, there you have it. My first post … More to come! (And I will transfer some recent posts from my other blogs …)

This photo is from memory lane. I chose it because it is of my youngest son … And he is sitting in the cockpit of an F-16. Which is what I feel as though is “flying” me into the next leg of my journey!

Tonight, I celebrated with my son as he got his braces off today. We shared this moment (smile, let me see again) together after he arrived home from a College Night at a local university. As I am seeing him without metal in his mouth (for the first time in almost five years) and listening to him talk about his adventures at the event … It occurred to me that motherhood (at least of the full-time variety) is just about to the point of being downsized!

Upon learning that he enjoyed meeting the representative from a particular college, I remembered that his older brother was once interested in that very same college. So, we called said brother (as he lives halfway across the country) and chatted for a while as he was brought up-to-date on the goings on ’round here.

All of the changes which occur during the years of young manhood are like mile markers alerting the “driving-mother” (and don’t we do A LOT of that!) that her journey is coming to an end.

Sure, there will be “vacation trips” after our children reach adulthood. But for the most part, these will be but brief and treasured times; we train up our children in the way they should go, so they will do just that: Go!

Which makes no sense, of course! We love ‘em, can’t live without them so we raise ‘em and set ‘em free! That makes no sense at all!

Sort of like me being up past midnight so I can document this moment in my history!

Repost from original Dessert Years …

Photo Credit

Sometimes the way we feel can be visualized something like the image above.

We find our ourselves running, running, running … Unless, we have some sort of Plan — the proverbial rein over the horsepower of Time.

I am jotting down the final notes of my latest composition — my own rhythm — that pattern of noted duration which produces sprightly music to dance to! It is a lively beat, with a sprinklin’ of sweet sixteenth notes combined with a few quarter rests, and a spicy variety of notes which combine for an-oh-so-warm but soothing harmony.

This rhythm allows me to approach my life, my work and my dreams via “single handling” …“Single handling requires that once you begin, you keep working at the task, without diversion or distraction, until the job is 100% complete. You keep urging yourself onward by repeating the words “Back to work!” over and over whenever you are tempted to stop or do something else.” —Brian Tracy

The current arrangement includes time to “be” — thus, fueling the creativity within my heart … That essential aspect of one’s day that is often the first thing to go when we are running.

Sometimes running is necessary. Afterall, it allows for us to fool ourselves into believing that we are getting it “all” done. Yeh, right! And of course, ultimately it allows us to realize the value of relaxation. When we finally collapse … But more than that, The Run (well, the proverbial pause after the run!) it is an opportunity for us to reexamine our priorities.

It is my habit to be more of a sprinter than a long-distance runner. I am training to resume my long-ago habit of being a devoted long-distance runner — as in pacing myself for the long haul instead of running, stopping, running, collapsing, running … In other words: Dancing to my own rhythm instead of finding myself out of breath and out of sync with my goals!

This has involved breaking the cycle of my old coping patterns; and that takes time. When life gets busy, we all default to what is familiar. And, making new habits familiar is sometimes like following that Yellow-Brick Road: There is a lot of effort to “find” something you realize you already had. You simply needed to know it, live it — and just do it!

Because … We always “know” what to do, what needs to be changed, what needs to be eliminated, etc.

However, a word of warning. Once you begin to ACT and break the cycle of your old coping patterns and behaviors, there will be (probable) havoc. Especially if those around you are not breaking their own coping patterns.

Unless everyone around us changes — when we decide change something — said “everyones” become our “reason” for doing the same ‘ol, same ‘ol. It is called The Crawdad Syndrome.

Don’t allow anyone or anything to keep you in the crawdad bucket!

Find your rhythm and dance to the music, sister!

Establishing a new center requires being out of balance as you discover the details of new path (in unexplored territory) you have forged. Journey on … Balance will come.

When you decide to expand (or delete) elements of your life, what was “center” before, changes. So, why is it that we tend to scurry about wondering what happened to our routine? Having experienced this — various times and in varying degrees — during my forty-seven years, it is still an “aha-moment” when I realize I am experiencing it once again!

This time it was a kinder, gentler experience as I realized it is part of the proverbial process.

proc·ess –noun
1. a systematic series of actions directed to some end
2. a continuous action, operation, or series of changes taking place in a definite manner

Repost from Greenhouse Blog

It has been a while since I posted a Fab Friday! And let me tell ya’ll it has been a week! And the “nothing-is-scheduled” Friday is most certainly fabulous!

Due to my adventures in minivan transport (due to my wonderful son’s lack of a driver’s license) as well as real-life (in the spin cycle!) my “new normal” sleep schedule has been modified. After evening events, it is this mother’s joy to get the complete rundown of said wonderful son’s activities, thoughts and insights (with regard to being a young man with great friends, who share great times together).

However, my previous 10 p.m. – 5 a.m. schedule has been semi-permanently changed — to 12 midnight-ish to 7 a.m. (After said sleep, I jump out of bed, throw clothes on, lace-up my MBT’s, make my bed, toss some kibbles in my Lexxi’s bowl … And dash out the door to enjoy my morning 2-3 mile “walkie-talkie” with my longtime “walkie-talkie” buddies!)

Concerning wonderful-son’s lack of a driver’s license … Any mother can attest to this: The twisted logic in actually even wanting one’s “baby” to obtain such a thing! If it were not for the time he and I chat in minivan transport — well, I would be left with only the late night summaries. (Which are never the same without the introduction that begins the moment wonderful-son hops in the minivan transport!)

Repost from original Dessert Years …